Babalaas Monday...

1.Two Lenasian cousins, Ravi and Pravesh, are walking down the street.
They happen to come upon a crematorium.
Ravi promptly asks Pravesh, "hey no man my cousin, what's this crematorium thing?"
Pravesh, "hey no man, how must I know?"Ravi, "Well, run in there and check it out!"
Pravesh runs in, a couple minutes later he exits the crematorium severely beaten, covered in his own blood.
Ravi, quite shocked, asks, "And now Pravesh, what happened to you man?"
Pravesh, "No man, I go inside, right!" Ravi, "Right?" Pravesh, "I see all these sad people standing around, right?" Ravi, "Right?" Pravesh, "So I ask them, hey what's cooking?"

2.One day a gay man goes in for his doctor's appointment and asks the doctor, "Do you have anything to make hair grow on my chest?" The doctor immediately grabs a jar of Vaseline and says,” if you get a friend to rub this on your chest everyday, within a month or two you'll start to see some growth. The man replies,” Well if that was true, I'd have a pony tail coming out my ass!"

3.A young fellow ran into an old man who was carrying a bag. "What's in the bag?" the youngster asked. "magic apples", the old man replied. "Prove it", said the young man.
"Well, besides apples, what are your favourite two fruits?" asked the old man. "Watermelon and peaches", he answered. The man handed him an apple and told him to try it out. The boy took a bite and said that it tasted like a watermelon. "Ok, turn it over", he said.
The boy did and took another bite and said that it tasted like a peach. The youngster was impressed but still unconvinced that they were magic.
The old fellow told him to name something else that he liked to eat. "I like to eat pussy." he snapped. The man handed him another apple and told him to try it. He took a big bite, spit it out, wiped his mouth and exclaimed, "That tasted like shit". The old man looked at him, smiled and said, "Turn it over."